Einfach Fun (!)
Re: Einfach Fun (!)
did you just say something?
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trykyn
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Re: Einfach Fun (!)
Bread is dangerous!!
1. More than 98 percent of convicted felons are bread users.
2. Fully HALF of all children who grow up in bread-consuming households score below average on standardized tests.
3. In the 18th century, when virtually all bread was baked in the home, the average life expectancy was less than 50 years; infant mortality rates were unacceptably high; many women died in childbirth; and diseases such as typhoid, yellow fever, and influenza ravaged whole nations
4. More than 90 percent of violent crimes are committed within 24 hours of eating bread.
5. Bread is made from a substance called "dough." It has been proven that as little as one pound of dough can be used to suffocate a mouse. The average North American eats more bread than that in one month!
6. Primitive tribal societies that have no bread exhibit a low incidence of cancer, Alzheimer's, Parkinson's disease, and osteoporosis.
7. Bread has been proven to be addictive. Subjects deprived of bread and given only water to eat begged for bread after as little as two days.
8. Bread is often a "gateway" food item, leading the user to "harder" items such as butter, jelly, peanut butter, and even cold cuts.
9. Bread has been proven to absorb water. Since the human body is more than 90 percent water, it follows that eating bread could lead to your body being taken over by this absorptive food product, turning you into a soggy, gooey bread-pudding person.
10. Newborn babies can choke on bread.
11. Bread is baked at temperatures as high as 240 degrees Celsius! That kind of heat can kill an adult in less than one minute.
12. Most bread eaters are utterly unable to distinguish between significant scientific fact and meaningless statistical babbling.
1. More than 98 percent of convicted felons are bread users.
2. Fully HALF of all children who grow up in bread-consuming households score below average on standardized tests.
3. In the 18th century, when virtually all bread was baked in the home, the average life expectancy was less than 50 years; infant mortality rates were unacceptably high; many women died in childbirth; and diseases such as typhoid, yellow fever, and influenza ravaged whole nations
4. More than 90 percent of violent crimes are committed within 24 hours of eating bread.
5. Bread is made from a substance called "dough." It has been proven that as little as one pound of dough can be used to suffocate a mouse. The average North American eats more bread than that in one month!
6. Primitive tribal societies that have no bread exhibit a low incidence of cancer, Alzheimer's, Parkinson's disease, and osteoporosis.
7. Bread has been proven to be addictive. Subjects deprived of bread and given only water to eat begged for bread after as little as two days.
8. Bread is often a "gateway" food item, leading the user to "harder" items such as butter, jelly, peanut butter, and even cold cuts.
9. Bread has been proven to absorb water. Since the human body is more than 90 percent water, it follows that eating bread could lead to your body being taken over by this absorptive food product, turning you into a soggy, gooey bread-pudding person.
10. Newborn babies can choke on bread.
11. Bread is baked at temperatures as high as 240 degrees Celsius! That kind of heat can kill an adult in less than one minute.
12. Most bread eaters are utterly unable to distinguish between significant scientific fact and meaningless statistical babbling.
Re: Einfach Fun (!)
Scotty-Zitat, Folge 14: "Captain, entweder wir schaffens - oder wir explodieren."
Re: Einfach Fun (!)
Waaah, 2224!LX hat geschrieben:falsch, 2223!tEmP hat geschrieben:2222 antworten ;)
Re: Einfach Fun (!)
Doch nicht, es sind 2225.. Was soll ich nur tunLX hat geschrieben:Waaah, 2224!LX hat geschrieben:falsch, 2223!tEmP hat geschrieben:2222 antworten ;)
Re: Einfach Fun (!)
hört auf rumzuspacken!
....
.......
2229?
Versteh ich nicht
....
.......
2229?
Versteh ich nicht
Scotty-Zitat, Folge 14: "Captain, entweder wir schaffens - oder wir explodieren."
Re: Einfach Fun (!)
Manchmal kann man eine tödliche Bombe einfach nicht loswerden.
Re: Einfach Fun (!)
Manchmal kann man eine tödliche Bombe einfach nicht loswerden.
Re: Einfach Fun (!)
Almighty xkcd in action
http://michaelrose.tumblr.com/post/6013 ... am-rule-34
Der (zugehörige) comic:
http://www.xkcd.com/505
http://michaelrose.tumblr.com/post/6013 ... am-rule-34
Der (zugehörige) comic:
http://www.xkcd.com/505
Manchmal kann man eine tödliche Bombe einfach nicht loswerden.
Re: Einfach Fun (!)
<+TheUltra4sshole> I mean, we started 2 nights before, recruiting strippers to show up
<+TheUltra4sshole> things got out of hand, and we end up with 10 kegs, and who knows how many imported sluts
<+TheUltra4sshole> I'm not talking tundra wookies
<+TheUltra4sshole> I mean, decent-looking chicks
<+TheUltra4sshole> they'd ranks a 6 or 7 here, but are fucking TEN in alaska
<+TheUltra4sshole> party goes awesome
<+TheUltra4sshole> don't catch any of the game
<+TheUltra4sshole> we all pass out by about 3 am
<+TheUltra4sshole> first call is at 6 am
<+TheUltra4sshole> and being professional alcoholics, we rigged the central firealarm to go off 10 minutes before first call
<+TheUltra4sshole> well, we all wake up to the fire alarm, clean the shithole up, then go down to PT formation
<+TheUltra4sshole> just expecting a 10-mile detox run or something gay like that
<+TheUltra4sshole> 1SG says we're having a health and welfare inspection
<+TheUltra4sshole> where he goes through everbody's room and fucks you up for anything that's out of place
<+TheUltra4sshole> well... we had 10 empty kegs and a buncha passed out whores in our building...
<+TheUltra4sshole> not to mention the little shit like bottle caps and whatnot
<+TheUltra4sshole> thank GOD he went to consolidated barracks first, so we had about an hour to get everything cleaned up
<+TheUltra4sshole> you wanna talk about a buncha men working as a team...
<+TheUltra4sshole> we had the buffer going, you heard nothing but vacuums, sweeping, mopping, and calls for the medic to get a hooker with an IV
<+TheUltra4sshole> pure mayhem
<+TheUltra4sshole> we get all the sluts out of our own rooms, and since the dayroom only had a little bit of furniture and we can work on it together, we all hit it at once
<+TheUltra4sshole> well...there was one chick left over
<+TheUltra4sshole> still passed out, topless in a leather skirt
<+TheUltra4sshole> when we heard CQ on the first floor call "AT EASE!"
<+TheUltra4sshole> fucking panic
<+TheUltra4sshole> Aubaugh, being the smart crazy jew he was, stole a buncha rappelling gear from mountaineering
<+TheUltra4sshole> tied her passed-out ass up in a swiss-seat
<+TheUltra4sshole> (mind you, she was wearing JUST a skirt, and a swiss seat goes between the legs)
<+TheUltra4sshole> tie the 120 to the center pillar, tied her figure 8 off in a bowline, and pushed her out the window
<+TheUltra4sshole> she hung there for FORTY FIVE FUCKING MINUTES
<+TheUltra4sshole> We pass the inspection
<+TheUltra4sshole> BUT
<+TheUltra4sshole> as 1SG was walking out of the barracks, he walked around the outside looking for cigarette butts and caught us hauling her naked ass back in the window...
<+TheUltra4sshole> Fail
<+TheUltra4sshole> we had such a good chance to get away with it...
<+TheUltra4sshole> man was that a long week for charlie company, 2-1 infantry
<+TheUltra4sshole> things got out of hand, and we end up with 10 kegs, and who knows how many imported sluts
<+TheUltra4sshole> I'm not talking tundra wookies
<+TheUltra4sshole> I mean, decent-looking chicks
<+TheUltra4sshole> they'd ranks a 6 or 7 here, but are fucking TEN in alaska
<+TheUltra4sshole> party goes awesome
<+TheUltra4sshole> don't catch any of the game
<+TheUltra4sshole> we all pass out by about 3 am
<+TheUltra4sshole> first call is at 6 am
<+TheUltra4sshole> and being professional alcoholics, we rigged the central firealarm to go off 10 minutes before first call
<+TheUltra4sshole> well, we all wake up to the fire alarm, clean the shithole up, then go down to PT formation
<+TheUltra4sshole> just expecting a 10-mile detox run or something gay like that
<+TheUltra4sshole> 1SG says we're having a health and welfare inspection
<+TheUltra4sshole> where he goes through everbody's room and fucks you up for anything that's out of place
<+TheUltra4sshole> well... we had 10 empty kegs and a buncha passed out whores in our building...
<+TheUltra4sshole> not to mention the little shit like bottle caps and whatnot
<+TheUltra4sshole> thank GOD he went to consolidated barracks first, so we had about an hour to get everything cleaned up
<+TheUltra4sshole> you wanna talk about a buncha men working as a team...
<+TheUltra4sshole> we had the buffer going, you heard nothing but vacuums, sweeping, mopping, and calls for the medic to get a hooker with an IV
<+TheUltra4sshole> pure mayhem
<+TheUltra4sshole> we get all the sluts out of our own rooms, and since the dayroom only had a little bit of furniture and we can work on it together, we all hit it at once
<+TheUltra4sshole> well...there was one chick left over
<+TheUltra4sshole> still passed out, topless in a leather skirt
<+TheUltra4sshole> when we heard CQ on the first floor call "AT EASE!"
<+TheUltra4sshole> fucking panic
<+TheUltra4sshole> Aubaugh, being the smart crazy jew he was, stole a buncha rappelling gear from mountaineering
<+TheUltra4sshole> tied her passed-out ass up in a swiss-seat
<+TheUltra4sshole> (mind you, she was wearing JUST a skirt, and a swiss seat goes between the legs)
<+TheUltra4sshole> tie the 120 to the center pillar, tied her figure 8 off in a bowline, and pushed her out the window
<+TheUltra4sshole> she hung there for FORTY FIVE FUCKING MINUTES
<+TheUltra4sshole> We pass the inspection
<+TheUltra4sshole> BUT
<+TheUltra4sshole> as 1SG was walking out of the barracks, he walked around the outside looking for cigarette butts and caught us hauling her naked ass back in the window...
<+TheUltra4sshole> Fail
<+TheUltra4sshole> we had such a good chance to get away with it...
<+TheUltra4sshole> man was that a long week for charlie company, 2-1 infantry
Manchmal kann man eine tödliche Bombe einfach nicht loswerden.
Re: Einfach Fun (!)
Manchmal kann man eine tödliche Bombe einfach nicht loswerden.
Re: Einfach Fun (!)
Ich muss immer wieder grinsen wenn ich bei uns im Park das schild seh, hab's heut mal fotografiert ;)
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